Two years after being married, my husband and I decided to take a leap and go off all forms of birth control. It actually went more like "Hey dude, I don't want to be on this stuff anymore; are you ok with that?" And after talking it out for a while, he decided it was the right thing to do. I spent those first two years, being unbalanced, hormonal, emotional; three things that I had never been before in my life. So when I went off the birth control, it wasn't really a surprise that I felt instantly better. But a few months into "trying" and nothing was happening. We started seeing doctors. I started getting blood tests, and we learned that I had a few problems. I have PCOS and Endometriosis. So we saw more doctors and had more tests and started the road of infertility.
After five years of infertility, I was exhausted. I was tired of surgeries, blood tests, medication, waiting for hours in doctors offices. I was ready to make a change. We started talking about adoption, and for a while it didn't feel right. There was never that moment of "We need to do this." Until one day, I made a decision to start the process on my own. I was going to start the home study process, until I stopped myself to pray about if this was the right thing to do. I was one word into my silent prayer when I got a huge "WAIT!" I was devastated. I didn't want to wait anymore. Hadn't I been waiting long enough? Well I waited. And it was maybe two months later when I got a call from a friend saying that her sister was pregnant
and was thinking about placing her child for adoption and were we interested. After a quick conversation about it with my husband, we decided to go for it. We sent a quick and dirty letter and photos to our friend. To make a long story short, we were chosen, and only a month later we were holding our little boy and taking him home with us.
And now three years later, here we are. We have a gorgeous, fun-loving, crazy, friendly, sweet little boy who keeps us stocked up on too-tight hugs, eskimo kisses, and snuggles. I know that our family isn't complete yet, and we are working on it. Hopefully one day soon I will be able to write a post about that. But no matter what happens, I will always love us. I know that I am lucky and blessed.
But I also know that all of this is and always will be hard work. Keeping a family together and happy and fed and fully dressed takes a lot of work. It is a work that I love doing (ok maybe not the cooking part, but I have an awesome husband who does that.) Adoption takes a lot of work. There are a lot of people who deserve to be a part of our family, and we have worked hard to make that all work, and let's be honest, sometimes it doesn't work that well. I know that I will spend my life working hard for my family, but I also know that there are innumerable blessings because of that hard work. And that is why I love this quote by Harold B. Lee, "The most important work you will ever do, will be within the walls of your own home."
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